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Many pages like this exist, but I decided to start collecting my favourites :)

   22:54:52 hacker: Did you try firefox to port 22 ;)
   22:54:52 MattJ_: "This address is restricted
                         This address uses a network port which is normally used for purposes other than Web browsing.
                         Firefox has canceled the request for your protection."
   22:54:52 MattJ_: .
   22:54:52 niekie: For your protection?
   22:54:52 * MattJ_ feels protected
   22:54:53 niekie: Protect from what?
   22:54:53 MattJ_: Firefox is taking care of me <3
  
   18:33:52 Matt: heh, who doesn't want peer to peer rtp?
   18:33:53 hacker: Enterprises. They want a PBX.
   18:36:22 hacker: Carriers, they are regulated
   18:38:51 hacker: Sure you and I might like it, but who is paying?
   18:38:51 xepbot: waqas, of course :)
   18:41:21 hacker: Wow, I can't beleive I walked in to that. :)
  
   16:25:25 stpeter: hi Chris
   16:25:25 xepbot: Hi stpeter
   16:25:33 stpeter: heh
   16:25:37 stpeter: hi Chris
   16:25:37 xepbot: Hey :)
   16:25:41 stpeter: hmm
   16:25:43 stpeter: weird
   16:25:52 Chris Mullins: Good morning all.
   16:26:02 stpeter: xepbot: you rock
  
 16:47:00 Chris Mullins: I do remember that when I first looked at it, it took me a long time to get it right - and many clients were buggy.
 16:47:08 stpeter: and GTalk and iChat do odd things, IIRC
 16:47:08 xepbot: Yes. It's puzzling.
 16:56:31 stpeter: xepbot: are you really a bot?
 16:56:31 xepbot: I am a hal 9000 computer.
 16:56:31 stpeter: LOL
 
 (#lua)
 <Slade-> ugh python channel requires ident :/
 <opqdonut> freenode is quite fascistic
 <rici> i would say that's #python being fascistic
 <rici> goes along with the forced indentation camps
 
 (John is a bot)
 > 13:44:08 EnZI: Hi all!
 > 13:44:14 John: Hi there, how are you?
 > 13:44:17 nhdezoito_pt-br: hi EnZI
 > 13:45:43 EnZI: How are you?
 > 13:45:48 John: I'm fine thanks, and you?
 > 13:45:50 nhdezoito_pt-br: fine tanks
 > 13:46:18 EnZI: I'm fine too
 > 13:46:21 John: Excellent!
 > 13:46:35 EnZI: Where you from?
 > 13:46:46 John: UK, and you?
 > 13:46:46 EnZI: where are you from)
 > 13:46:50 EnZI: Russia
 > 13:46:51 nhdezoito_pt-br: I'm Brazilian
 > 13:46:57 John: Russia is a big place
 
 21:36:11 lynx: have you thought about DNS over XMPP? duck
 21:36:33 mattj: :D
 21:37:12 teo: lynx: dns over xmpp, which in turn relies on dns. it would be cool
 21:39:15 lynx: let's implement xmpp on top of udp, then implement tcp on top of xmpp duck deeper
 
 23:38:59 waqas: oh no, MattJ doesn't do typos ... his bugs are very deep and complicated
 
 20:31:48 HAL: Error: utils.lua:160: bad argument #1 to 'pairs' (table expected, got nil)
 It can only be attributable to human error.
 20:32:00 MattJ: Ooohh
 20:32:14 MattJ: That explains yesterday's error
 ...
 20:36:25 MattJ: The structure of v2.0 has changed too much
 20:36:28 waqas: with newer bugs to exploit
 20:36:40 MattJ: There are none
 20:36:54 waqas: so you say
 20:37:18 HAL: ME IS A BUGGY BOT
 20:40:02 MattJ: Except that one
 20:40:40 waqas: and so on and so forth ...
 
 17:23:25 <legoscia> i believe most Jabber developers hide a personal secret. that's why they concentrate 
                     on building communication tools, instead of actually communicating, and thereby risking 
                     to reveal their secret.
 
 17:24<Light Lan> msn down again
 17:24<astrobit> die MSN!
 17:25<MattyJ> \o/
 17:25<MattyJ> astrobit: How can MSN die? It's dead right now... :D
 17:26<astrobit> well....
 17:26<astrobit> mmm :/
 17:26<astrobit> dont wake up MSN!
 
 <fung> yea, i guess we should never tell a joke about anything that someone died from
 <fung> i dont think IRC with strangers is a good place to address them
 <rjek> MY PARENTS WHERE KILLED IN A FREAK IRC-RELATED ACCIDENT, YOU INSENSITIVE CLODS.
 <fung> OH *
 * rjek grins.
 <fung> MY PARENTS WERE KILLED BY CAPS LOCK
 <fung> my grandparents were killed by conjecture and ncurses
 <fung> im running out of things to enjoy
 <rjek> ncurses will drive most people to suicide.
 
 22:31<grzywacz> hi everyone
 22:31<grzywacz> hi stpeter :)
 22:33<stpeter> hi
 22:33<stpeter> I'm not part of everyone? :)
 
 13:47:56 linwidi has joined the group chat
 13:48:21 linwidi: hwah....many ppl here.
 13:49:26 linwidi: no one awake.
 13:49:29 linwidi has left
 13:49:55 legoscia: oh… that was fast ☺
 13:50:04 StephanieDaugherty: rofl
 13:50:15 StephanieDaugherty: I'll never understand why people do that.
 13:51:00 legoscia: i believe they are just people with short attention span looking for some human contact
 13:51:19 legoscia: unfortunately, all the chat rooms that i see them in are off-topic for that ☺
 13:52:18 legoscia: maybe all jabber clients should have a big button labeled "CHAT WITH PEOPLE", that brings them all into one chat room
 
 (#bash)
 <MattJ> <(sed 's/include\ <gloox\/\(.*\)>/include \"\1\"/' ../../glooxbindings-0.1.2-tmp/src/!(gloox).i | cat gloox/tessa.i -)
  That seems to be performing process substution for all files that match the pattern
  Instead of passing them to sed
 <greycat> what the HELL is that?
 <MattJ> It's beautiful
 
 [20:24]<TobiasFar> so edrin, what are you coding lately? :)
 [20:25]<edrin> nothing
 [20:25]<edrin> currently developing other things
 [20:25]<TobiasFar> like?
 [20:25]<elmex> a life? :)
 [20:25]<elmex> thats somewhere on my todo list
 [20:25]<TobiasFar> ahhh
 [20:25]<elmex> below 'rewriting linux kernel'
 
 <xamox> I don't hate gentoo by any means
 <xamox> I actually think it's awesome
 <xamox> like, I made a joke that when I formatted my primary PC and put 
         gentoo on it, that it gentook up my entire weekend
 <MattJ> xD
 
  [Alfred is a bot, the command 'tr es' translates English to Spanish...]
 [00:11]<scoundrel> tr es www.jabber.org/muc-logs/
 [00:11]<alfred> scoundrel: http: // www.jabber.org/muc-logs/
 
 [20:38]<TobiasFar> is it a MUST to have backward compatibility?
 [20:39]<stpeter> TobiasFar: the only thing you MUST do is die eventually, and even 
                  that is being worked on by some smart people ;-)
 
 [22:49:13]<Thorns> ping
 [22:49:29]<Thorns> *sigh*
 [22:49:32]<Thorns> Gn then
 [22:49:33]--- Thorns has left
 [22:49:34]<waqas> Night Thorns
 [22:49:35]<waqas> .
 [22:49:37]<MattJ> ,
 [22:49:47]<Yasm1ne> Thorns: Pong after: 34.5 sec.
 [22:49:50]<MattJ> xD
 [22:49:55]<waqas> :P
 
 [21:04:26] MattJ: !do php = "PHP is Bad"
 [21:04:27] HAL: Done :)
 [21:04:57] waqas: !do lua = "Lua is evil"
 [21:04:57] HAL: That's something I could not allow to happen.
 [21:05:00] waqas: !
 [21:05:03] MattJ: xD
 
 <deryni> gd.so looks to me like it statically links lua in, while postgres.so 
          doesn't. Though I can't imagine that matters here it can cause issues.
 <TobiasFar> so?
 <TobiasFar> what can i do?
 <Keffo> my laundry
 
 [07:32:56 PM] <Waqas> No. Its just that many things are easier in C++, so people 
                       prefer that. And it has the two pluses, so its cooler by definition.
 [07:33:21 PM] <Thorns> Hehe
 [07:33:45 PM] <Thorns> C++ should have been named at least +C+ if not ++C :P
 [07:33:54 PM] <Thorns> plusiplus! :P
 [07:34:26 PM] <Waqas> C++ is still C. ++C would have been D. +C+ wouldn't compile.
 [07:34:42 PM] <Thorns> xD
 [07:35:16 PM] <Thorns> I'm sending this to Matthew to add on his quotes page :D
 [07:35:25 PM] <Waqas>  :D
 
 [01:55:43] MattJ: I am sleeping
 [01:55:46] MattJ: What am I doing?
 [01:55:47] HAL: You are working on kickvites for HAL :)
 [01:55:52] MattJ: :O
 
 [19:03:41] louis.xvi.with.a.gun: In france there're are rumours saying that gentoo users 
                                  are so occuped by some compilation that they don't have 
                                  time to take a bath :O
 
 [18:30:35] waqas: Sup guys.
 [18:41:52] Thorns: waqas: sup
 [18:42:49] waqas: sup sup.
 [18:44:36] Thorns: sup nup
 [18:44:39] Thorns: sup nup's up
 [18:45:09] waqas: nup's sup's up?
 [18:45:21] Thorns: course :)
 [18:45:28] Thorns: It's what I said, isn't it? o_O
 [18:46:02] waqas: No its not.
 
 <tuntis> guys
 <tuntis> what should i do to get sleep
 <tuntis> if trying to remember an ISBN doesnt' work
 
 [23:21:46] sq89: (brb, restarting to ubuntu, my wireless card still doesn't work in vista)
 
 <the_plumber> did they use murcury?
 <eadthem> maby
 
 [14:59:59] v2.0: what is ai?
 [14:59:59] HAL: Ai is what u never will get
 
  (HAL is a bot)
 [22:39:14] centrogerencia: HOLA
 [22:39:20] centrogerencia: CHAMACOS
 [22:39:22] centrogerencia: Y CHAMACAS
 [22:39:34] centrogerencia: COMO ESTAN
 [22:39:35] v2.0: !es
 [22:39:36] HAL : Puedes hablar en español en jabberes@conf.jabberes.org y consultar tus dudas sobre Jabber
 [22:41:02] centrogerencia: OK MR. BOT
 [22:41:06] centrogerencia: YHANKS
 
 [18:44:35] <scoundrel> dict waterloo
 [18:44:37] <Wizard> scoundrel: 12 definitions retrieved
 "Waterloo" wn "WordNet (r) 2.0"
 Waterloo
 n 1: a final crushing defeat; "he met his Waterloo"
 2: the battle on 18 June 1815 in which Napoleon met his final
 defeat; Prussian and British forces under Blucher and the
 Duke of Wellington routed the French forces under Napoleon
 [syn: {Battle of Waterloo}]
 "Waterloo" moby-thes "Moby Thesaurus II by Grady Ward, 1.0"
 33 Moby Thesaurus words for "Waterloo":
 beating, collapse, conquering, conquest, crash, deathblow, debacle,
 defeat, destruction, downfall, drubbing, failure, fall, hiding,
 lambasting, lathering, licking, mastery, overcoming, overthrow,
 overturn, quietus, ruin, smash, subdual, subduing, subjugation,
 thrashing, trimming, trouncing, undoing, vanquishment, whipping
 "Waterloo" gazetteer "U.S. Gazetteer (1990)"
 Waterloo, AL (town, FIPS 80064)
 Location: 34.91671 [...]
 [18:44:37] <HAL> Wizard: Please shorten your messages, or use a service like http://pastebin.ca/
 [18:44:37] <HAL> Wizard: You are heading for a kick/ban
 [18:47:23] <Wizard> HAL: I kinda happy, thank you 1.66 seconds
 [18:47:33] <Wizard> HAL: no
 
 <Dr_Link> The day Microsoft makes a product that doesn't suck is the day they make a vacuum cleaner.
 
 [22:10:48] TobiasFar: haserl?
 [22:10:55] MattJ: GIYF
 [22:11:27] TobiasFar: Google It You Fancy guy?
 [22:37:53] stpeter.im: menzraf: use Google :)
 [22:38:12] menzraf: google?
 niekie: WhizHal: what is MattJ?
 WhizHal: MattJ: Mattj is a freshman to do is divert processing power to marry me. It's not like we typed "freeze-dried food".
 MattJ: hal: I am not going to marry you
 WhizHal: MattJ: Not much else to marry.

(for more context, see: ROBOT9000 and #xkcd-signal: Attacking Noise in Chat)…

 <thorns> Everyone is forced to cheat here
 <niek> You guys can't cheat.
 <thorns> I can
 <niek> thorns: oh?
 <tuntis> niek: anybody is free to set up a channel in ClueIRC, right?
 <thorns> What about:
 <thorns> "HI"
 -ROBOT9000/#signal- thorns, you have been muted for 1 minute 4 seconds.
 * ROBOT9000 removes voice from thorns
 <MattJ> Haha
 -ROBOT9000/#signal- MattJ, you have been muted for 4 minutes 16 seconds.
 * ROBOT9000 removes voice from MattJ
 <tuntis> Owned
 -ROBOT9000/#signal- tuntis, you have been muted for 4 seconds.
 * ROBOT9000 removes voice from tuntis
 * ROBOT9000 gives voice to tuntis
 <tuntis> ...Damnit
 -ROBOT9000/#signal- tuntis, you have been muted for 16 seconds.
 * ROBOT9000 removes voice from tuntis
 * niek laughs out loud.

#ubuntu-uk:

 <Zbrahead91> vim is ugly
 <DanielRM> :O
 <DanielRM> TAKE THAT BACK!
 <Zbrahead91> It is.
 * bjwebb has quit ("Ex-Chat")
 <Zbrahead91> Its uglier than the 2nd ugliest app in the world :P
 <Zbrahead91> bug number 1 in launchpad is just plain sad
 <Zbrahead91> Oh, and the development machine is in a VM
 * vyoman has joined #ubuntu-uk
 <Zbrahead91> My Mandrake 7.0 disk doesnt install properly >.<
 <DanielRM> Zbrahead91: you know, you just committed suicide three times over.
 <snogglethorpe> "And then the PYTHON descended from the heavens, and graced the world with HIS presence, and
                  the PYTHON said `thou shalt obey the whitespace!', and the people trembled..."
 [20:23:48] MattJ: thorns, see your email
 [20:27:25] thorns: MattJ, omg that password has stuck
 [20:27:34] MattJ: I know :D
 [20:27:43] thorns: I recently changed all my passes, because I think I gave it out
 [20:27:53] MattJ: It is a slight variation :)
 [20:28:07] thorns: Yeah but guess what my new password all around is? ^^
 [20:28:30] MattJ: don't tell me I just guessed it...? :D
 [20:29:36] thorns: You just did guess it :P
 <Laney> Anyone on Intrepid?
 <philwyett> Laney: I have intrepid A4 on a couple of crash boxes.
 <DanielRM> Laney: I'm on Intrepid.
 <mgdm> "intrepid A4" sounds like a daring piece of paper
 [22:16:13] crbrutus96 has joined the group chat
 [22:16:32] crbrutus96: hi
 [22:16:37] crbrutus96: hi
 [22:16:48] MattJ: Hi
 [22:16:55] waqas: Hey.
 [22:17:01] crbrutus96: bye
 [22:17:03] MattJ: Bye
 [22:17:04] crbrutus96 has left
 [22:17:24] MattJ: Quotes page -->
 [16:36:20] identi.ca:  ralphm: 
 [16:36:46] identi.ca:  dwd: @ralphm 
 [16:41:38] identi.ca:  ralphm: @dwd 
 [16:41:58] identi.ca:  dwd: @ralphm ! 
 [16:42:28] identi.ca:  mattj: @dwd @ralphm ?! 
 [16:43:55] identi.ca:  kev: @mattj @dwd @ralphm #?! 
 [16:46:07] identi.ca:  ralphm: @mattj @ralphm @kev !! ;-) 
 [15:56:39] Thorns: waqas, ... k. boring. just forget it.
 [15:56:52] Thorns: not to mention a little bit OT
 [15:57:04] MattJ: Ah, we do have prosody-chat, I should be in there :)
 [15:57:18] waqas: MattJ is away, so we can be OT all we want
 [15:57:27] MattJ: I'm not away, I'm here I tell you!
 [15:57:50] waqas: That's not what miranda is telling me, and it's more trustworthy
 [15:57:53] Thorns: You seem to be away
 [15:58:08] MattJ: No! I'm here!
 [15:58:21] waqas: Thorns: It's obviouly HAL pretending to be MattJ
 [15:58:50] Thorns: waqas, I don't think he's pretending anymore. I think HAL thinks he IS MattJ.
 [21:00:07] MattJ : Now I *know* why Tobias doesn't use Prosody on his server
 [21:00:33] Tobias: and why is that?
 [21:01:17] albert: Because he want to use all his RAM of course.
 [21:01:59] waqas: Yeah, Prosody wastes more RAM, by not using it.
 <MattJ> Out of all the channels I'm in on IRC, this one is the most argumentative :)
 <MattJ> Consistently
 <KrimZon> no it's not
 <popey> yes it is
 <zack_> Is http://downforeveryoneorjustme.com/ down or is it just me?
 <MattJ> hi!
 <TheVinn> hi!
 <jpjacobs> hi!
 <rjek> Spatula.
 <sanooj> you're obviously just back from the beer fest.
 <sanooj> trouble picking up on patterns and such.
 <jpjacobs> :)